Success in business is gender blind — Ebbi

Yvonne Nkekere Ebbi is the Senior Consultant of The Etiquette Place and the Executive Secretary of the United World Colleges, Nigeria. She is also an Author, speaker and Performance Poet.

A Graduate of the Coaching Academy UK, Yvonne worked as a Consultant in Nigeria’s pioneer Finishing School – Certified by the Protocol School of Washington- and has trained thousands of Executives in the art of savoire-faire and Executive Presentation. Excerpts:

As a Social Intelligence Consultant, Etiquette Expert, and Executive Coach, can you describe your experience … as a woman?

It’s been very interesting to see executives, professionals and everyday individuals put their best foot forward in their daily conversations because they have become socially intelligent and understand the connection between attitude and success.

Once people realise they are responsible for their own success, it changes everything. They become more deliberate in their actions and show more consideration for others.

In my opinion, success in business is gender blind. The key to success is knowledge.

First, know yourself. Who are you? Be brutally frank with yourself and tell yourself the truth. Self-awareness will prevent you from playing in many waters and help you determine your inner strength and innate abilities.

What is your vision? What do you really want to achieve? Dream big, but be smart enough to start small. Give it your all and GO for it!

Be curious and observant. Play smart. Understand how business works. Observe the attitude of the big players and commit yourself to achieving the ultimate.

I’m liberal and unconventional and that’s how I lead. However, I expect you to think, be initiative and responsible. I am firm, but fair and have zero tolerance for excuses. I don’t micro-manage.

When recruiting, I look out for five things: Passion/enthusiasm, courtesy, initiative, ‘learnability’ and common sense. Your real interview is your first assignment. When I give a task, I give you the liberty to create, innovate and remodel. I believe in my team and believe that they have all it takes to exceed expectations.

I believe I have what it takes to win. I concentrate on that and go for breaks. It works all the time. Success is gender blind!

What was the focus when you initially started Consulting?

My focus in The Etiquette Place has been to revolutionise the Nigerian community in matters relating to social intelligence, professional behavior, work ethics, executive etiquette and public speaking manners. We have positioned ourselves to brand Nigeria as a cultured, well-mannered and civil society. We are poised to make her the envy of the continent…one organisation at a time.

To what extent has Etiquette Consulting impacted positively on the average executive and professional in corporate Nigeria?

The bedrock of Etiquette is consideration for the next person. The indicators of a civilized society are summed up in the actions and attitudes of the people who constitute such a society.

The Etiquette Place has trained thousands of executives and professionals in corporate Nigeria.

Our in-house sessions and open programmes in Sheraton, Lagos, have been hugely successful. We have exposed corporate executives and professionals to executive intelligence, professional manners and social intelligence. We have shown them how to play in the global market by always putting their best foot forward. As a result of the exposure, they have gained confidence and have made progress in their corporate responsibilities and personal endeavours.

They now know that the best business etiquette calls for treating people cordially and that to behave cordially is to behave with sincerity and empathy…from the heart.

How did you develop the passion to groom, develop and tutor people from all lifestyles?

My personal mission is to help people find their purpose. To jolt them out of their comfort zones and inspire them to become all that they were made capable of being. I am interested in helping people discover who they really are so as to maximise their potentials. I’m excited about helping them find their true worth. I started by leading small groups as a teenager and challenging young people to discover and maximise their potentials. 

By identifying the need to help people live fulfilled lives, I found out early that when people found out the ‘why’ of their existence…their essence…their purpose…their core, they had more reasons to live meaningful lives. They lived with a sense of purpose and were happy and fulfilled.

There was a direct proportion between finding purpose and being fulfilled. I found this truth applicable at home and abroad. I am passionate about helping people define their personal brands and consciously projecting panache, élan and flair. You define your brand and your brand determines how far you’ll go.

How do you manage the many challenges you face in business…as a woman?

Challenges are inevitable. Challenges make you think and make you strong. They make you realise your core strength as an organisation.

The main duty of a chief executive is to think strategically and identify the market. Knowing your market determines how you position your brand, appeal to your customers and sell your product. It also helps you cut off non-essentials.

Your team must understand your leadership style and connect with it. When employees are engaged, they’ll run with the vision and bring results.

The common challenges have been: access to funds for business expansion, human capital and power. Running a business in Nigeria is particularly expensive, so you have to be creative, innovative and flexible. Be observant and play smart. These challenges are not exclusive to women.

Do you think that Nigerian women are doing enough to position themselves in the society?

We have started the process but we need to do more. The Nigerian woman must realise that nobody will give her the chance she truly deserves. She must take it. It all starts in the mind. We must believe that we can. We must think that we can and we must create opportunities to prove it.

Get involved. P-a-r-t-i-c-i-p-a-t-e. Resist the temptation to be a spectator! Be a crucial part of your home, community, organisation and society and large. Don’t just work – get involved. Manage, lead, and own the business. Develop an ownership mentality and exceed expectations. Get results.

You are so endowed! There’s much more in you than you think.

No more excuses and no more passing the buck. Wake up and smell the coffee.

Arguably, women have more content than men. But we wait too long trying to be perfect to even begin. The men start with less content and get perfect on the job. They understand the game. It’s a mind game…and they understand it.

Don’t let the fear of failing overwhelm you. Failure is a crucial part of success. So what if you fail? Get up and try again. We must not only equip ourselves with content, we must learn courage. We must dare! Brush off sentiments. Grow up. This is it. This is your life and there is no replay. Give it your best shot. Cultivate the spirit of excellence and dare to excel. Leadership, like authority, is assumed…not granted.